Making Myself at Home

So I found out that I really like to sleep. It is currently my favorite hobby. But Mom and Dad want me to eat every 2-3 hours, so they have to wake me up all the time. If it were up to me, I'd probably sleep through about half the meals, but then once I wake up I realize I actually am hungry. So I guess as much as I hate to admit it Mom and Dad know best. Anyway, Dad thinks it's really cute how long it takes me to wake up and wanted to show everyone. Last night while waking me up for my 3:30 AM meal, Dad shot some video he's been trying to post. I'm really embarrassed about it, as I really don't think my wake-up routine is anybody's business but mine, but there's nothing I can do about it - I'm a baby. I tried telling him not to post it, but he didn't seem to understand what I was saying. He just thought I was crying. Maybe I'll luck out and the video will never actually be posted, but if he does manage to make it work bear in mind that I did not approve. The Fresh Prince was right, parents just don't understand. And no, that reference is not too old for me to know - Dad played the song on the record player for me before I was born, so it is new to me. Oh, sorry - Dad said it is a turntable, not a record player. Excuuuuuse meee Dad, it's not like I'm less than a week old or anything.

So Mom, Dad, and I are settling in nicely at home. We've developed something of a routine, especially at night. I sleep. Then they wake me up at regular intervals to change me (if needed), feed me, burp me, and then rock me back to sleep. Then the cycle repeats. Sometimes I spit up at random times or go to the bathroom while my diaper's off, just to make things interesting. It really messes with Dad, since he likes things to be all neat and orderly. Time to cross that one off your list of favorite things, Dad, because I'm guessing you won't see neat and orderly again for at least 15-20 years. Neat and Orderly left town with Jack. Sometimes they try to keep me awake after the burping so that they can talk to me or read to me or just let me look around at things for a while. All of these things eventually make me tired, however, and I fall back into blissful slumber.

Dad also took some pictures to show how settled we are. There's a picture of Mom feeding me in their bedroom. I like the neat candles on the wall and my fun little baskety bed. Eddy the Dog sleeps under my bed to protect me. Also, there's a picture of Dad relaxing outdoors with Eddy the Dog yesterday. Eddy was sad about getting no attention lately, so Dad let him swing in the hammock for a while. I got some sun with Grandma and Grandpa Vogt and Mom, who all wanted to enjoy the beautiful afternoon outside. Then, last night Grandpa made some pork chops that smelled really good, but I couldn't eat them because I'm not old enough. I can't wait until I'm able to eat food that smells that good. I hope they'll find a way to serve it in a bottle by then. I don't know why more people don't eat from bottles. You don't have to use silverware, spend time cutting things, waste energy scooping and chewing, or even look at what you're eating. You can just sit back and take in all the sights and sounds around you. Just try eating a steak while watching a Samurai movie with subtitles. You'll miss a quarter of what is being said while you look down at your steak to cut it. With a bottle, I can keep my eyes on one thing the whole time. Mostly I'm just looking at whoever is feeding me, but if I wanted to watch a Samurai movie, I could do that too. Of course, I can't read yet, so that would present a bit of a hurdle to me actually understanding the movie. I thought reading would be easy, but there are like 26 different letters, and they can be arranged in a billion different combinations, so it is rather complex. And then their - I mean there - are a bunch of crazy words that sound the same but are spelled different or are spelled almost the same but pronounced differently, and they really throw a kink in the works. And if that wasn't bad enough, there are people everywhere that don't actually now - I mean know - the correct rules of grammar or pronunciation, so they confuse people who are actually trying to learn these things, especially when they make up words like "you's" and "nucular". Maybe I'll just learn French or Spanish or Cantonese instead, it might be easier.

Anyway, I got off the subject. What was the subject? I guess I was just saying that I'm getting pretty comfortable now in my new home, and I'm really excited about actually seeing my parents rather than just hearing them. Like last night when Dad read me to sleep with the mythological stories of Persius and Andromeda, and I got to watch his facial expressions and see the book containing the stories. Or when Mom rocked me back to sleep later in the night and I got to see her smile at me and feel her kiss my forehead. It's better than I could have ever dreamed (and I dreamed - or is it dreamt? - a lot, just ask Mom). I've been getting closer lately to this "smiling" thing, and I expect any day now I'll be able to actually do it on purpose so I can show Mom and Dad how happy I am. Knowing my dad, he'll get a picture of it, so when I actually start smiling on purpose, you'll know about it, too. Until then, I'll keep working on it. It is currently on my "to do" list with "learn how my hands work" and "try to keep more of my food inside me". One thing at a time.

Until next time,

Azja